Sometimes I wonder when it was that I lost my enthusiasm for technology...

Hello all

In order to beef up our security here in the office we’re installing Palm Readers for each of the office doors. In the future in order to enter the premises you’ll have to punch in your current door code and then let a machine read your palm. In order for this to get underway, I’m going to need for each of you to come and register with our machine. It’s a fairly painless procedure and should only take a minute of your time. Please leave any palm reading jokes you might have at your desk. It would also probably be nice if you washed your hands first.


Thanks a million

el JEFE

minutes later...

Hello all

Let me clarify a few points. 1)the Finger scan project was insufficient for our needs and has therefore been upgraded to the Palm Scan project. You may speculate on the reasons for this to your heart’s content, suffice it to say that we in IT have become reluctant to shake hands with those of you in the general population. 2)At this point if you have a door code, you are eligible for the palm scanner. Those of you without door codes will not need to come scan their palms at this time. 3)If you haven’t had your photo taken we will also need to do this when you come to get your palm scanned. If you’ve done the palm thing and haven’t had a picture taken, you’ll have to come back. 4)I would like, at this point, to reiterate for the disappointed that there will not be any palm reading jokes on my watch.

Thanks

el JEFE

The rubbing alcohol in my cube is staring me right in the eye....
el Jefe